This is a difficult blog to write because I have been in a frump all day long!  Too many nights of interrupted sleep catches up to you.  Last night I was sleeping pretty good when the phone rang at 2 AM.  We both jumped and of course your immediate thought is it must be one of your kids.  Your mind races to where they are.....Geoff was working nights last night, Kelli was in New York.  Bill answered and it was my uncle calling from London, England.  He had no idea what the time change was and was phoning to see how I was doing.  Nice of him to call, he truly meant well but that really set the tone for the rest of the night.

Bill was off to replace his windshield in his truck today and I tackled a bunch of muffins, finally planted my flowers and took Boomer for a walk.  Just haven't been able to kick this grumpy feeling today though and am thinking it was a good thing I was on my own.  When I was cooking the muffins I was wondering at how much I enjoyed this activity and it suddenly came to me.  It is the one thing I can still do the same now as before the surgery.  Almost every other single thing I do has been impacted by this surgery.  That is a hard pill to swallow.

I started to think about the things I really miss.
-my health
-my voice
-my laugh
-eating and drinking.  Just stop and think about how much of your day revolves around this activity.  It is probably one of the most social things we do.
-going for a walk without puffing
-running
-all my fitness/sports activities
-golf
-sleeping an entire night and waking up rested and ready to go
-sleeping on my stomach
-sleeping flat
-talking on the phone
-the kids at school!  Today I was walking in the ravine and I could hear the kids at Tom Baines laughing and screaming in the school yard.  Made me homesick for those little guys!
-the Winter Club
-my body
-inviting friends for dinner and being invited to their place for dinner
-having a glass of wine
-coffee
-making small talk  (with limited voice, I've become selective about what I say)

There is more and I could go on and on but the pity party must end! Hopefully, no 2 AM phone calls and a decent nights sleep will put me back on track!   Tomorrow's a new day!
Tomorrow is my swallow test!  I am hopeful that will go well for me!  Then I can start tackling some of that delicious orange jello sitting in my fridge!