I have neglecged the blog for a day.  I had my appointment at the Tom Baker on Tuesday, another long, long day.  We arrived early for blood work that the doctor wanted to have prior to meeting with me.  I was sitting there waiting for the tech to get to me and it was a busy day.  I took note that the one approaching me was one who is a recent hire.  I think the last time I was in she was having her orientation.  Inwardly I groaned a little as Ihave noticed that over time my veins are getting more and more scarring and getting into them is a bit more of a challenge than it once was.  Oh well....hope for the best.  Unfortunately, I recognized the symptoms of a nervous Nellie.  Slow, slow insertion of the needle, which always hurts more and then very slow flow of blood.  She wiggle it and squiggled it and finally said she "thought" that would be good enough.  We left there and headed upstairs for an ECG then back to wait to see the doctor.  After waiting for about 30 minutes in came the nurse and announced that the lab had just called and there was not sufficient blood in the sample and I would have to return to the lab for a second blood test, then another hour wait for the results.  Not impressed!  Sat down in my chair and shook my head in disblief when, as luck would have it, the same tech as I had earlier approached me to do it again, clearly having no recollection of me.  I usually say nothing but have been a tad cranky lately and said "Hmm, you're going to try again I see....."  She looked at me with a blank look and I told her I had been there an hour and a half earlier but that she had not taken enough blood.  She quickly said she would get another tech to do this test wich was a blessing because the second girl had absolutely no problem whatsoever.  Back to the waiting area and finally in to see the doctor an hour later!  I have been having severe fatigue since satrting on these new drugs.  Honestly, I would have to say the fatigue I have experienced on this drug have by far exceeded ANY reaction I have had to any other chemotherapy or radiation.  I am short of breath with very little exertion and find just moving from one room to the next tiring.  It is a stunning revelation for me.  I have been quite concerned about how I have been feeling.  The dotor reviewed my blood work and was very happy with the results.  My White cell count which at one point was 85 has now dropped to 18 (normal is 10}  my platelets are jumping around a bit but this is to be expected and should level out soon as well.  All my liver enzymes and other systems show normal or near normal readings which is reassuring but my hemoglobin is on the low side.  When I first started on this journey Kelli used to marvel at my hemoblobin.  Because of all my exercise and running I have always had a very high oxygen carrying capacity and normal hemoglobin for me was usually around 140.  Yesterday I was at 102.  She said if it dropped into the 80s or 90s they would give me a blood tranfusion but at this point I would just have to bear with this feeling of malias I am experienceing which really, really sucks.  Poor Boomer.  I don't even have any energy to take him for a walk at the moment.  If anyone out there ever feels like borrowing a black lab for a walk I have one to lend!  Anyways, the doctor said these symptoms should not last but I could feel lke this for up to a month.  I felt bad today when Kelli called. As most of would say conversationally she asked what my plans were for tomorrow and I actually snapped at her.  I had had the same question already today from Maureen, my Dad and Bill. I think I just want to hole up and become a recluse for about a month when I can emerge a much, much pleasant person.  This is so unlike me and to be physically exhausted from the moment you get out of bed is almost more than one can bare.  I know I have to plan some non-physical projects and did work on my 1988 photo album for awhile today which certainlyl did bring a few smiles to my face.
So my friends....bear with me....maybe give me a bit of a wide berth.  I am actually doing quite well and the outlook in a month or so is pretty positive.  I know I worry you.  I know this when I talk to my cousin on the telephone and she shows up on my doorstep 20 minutes later, just to say hi and eyeball me, I know this when my friend Kathy drives in all the way from Gull Lake to spend a day doing golf retail therapy with me (she hates retail therapy) I know this when I see the worried look on Jenifers face when I don;t eat my sandwich or when Maureen shows up with a seafood casserole she just happened to throw together this afternoon.  I try to be bright and cheery but it is eluding me at the moment.  I wrestled at sharing this with all of you today.  On the one hand I know how faithfully I have preached the positive card and for the most part I think I have played it well.  I thought to myself, I won't see most of these people over the next few weeks so I could just write cheery blogs and no one would be the wiser.  Then I realized that I have quite a few friends reading along who are traveeling along parallel roadways.  They are experiencing their own twists and turns and I know that it helps to hear that it is normal to have troughs once in awhile and that we must share these with those we care about.  So there will be better days ahead.....but I think I'm looking at a few weeks of pretty laid back living for a while at least.  Bear with me!